Okay, I've read the Query Ninja's suggestions (it's no coincidence that Query sort of rhymes with Carrie) and, once I was done genuflecting in awe, I rewrote The Taste of Magic's query again. And I really, really promise this is the last time I'll post it! Really! Not a lie this time!
I don't know if it's getting any better. I'm so bad at this, and I've sweated over it so long now, that I feel like I'm just stringing words together at random at this point. At least I'm down to just two names now.
Analefa Miradwen is being pulled in different directions by people she's not sure she can trust.
After a vampire mage tries to abduct Ana, she finds out that her blood enhances a mage's spells. Vincent Ondarr, the king's enforcer, thinks he knows why: her mother was a werepanther, and the shape-shifting magic Ana should have been born with is instead concentrated in her blood.
Ana's never told anyone about her parentage and she's furious with Vincent for prying into her secrets. When Ana meets a group of amateur mages agitating for half-breed rights, she offers to help them--even if it means offering them her blood as well.
But the vampire mage is still after Ana, and he seems to have a connection with the half-breed rights group. And while Vincent wants to keep Ana locked in the Tower of Justice for her own safety, his interest in her goes beyond simple protection. If she's going to survive, Ana needs to decide who's really on her side.