Wow, am I boring

You know what I've done all day? Listened to Pandora Radio and failed to write.

Actually, I did have galleys of The Taste of Magic to proof and return (for the upcoming print edition), which I did. It took me most of the day. And I did go into Knoxville for a local NaNoWriMo write-in, except that the Panera where we were meeting was absolutely packed and I couldn't find our group, so I left again. Then I took a walk since it was almost 75 degrees out. Oh, and I went grocery shopping.

See? Boring.

On the other hand, I've opened up my NaNo file at last and I'm planning to write my way to a scene where our hero is mistaken, due to a complex series of actions he has no control over, for a princess. By the princess's fiance. So I may be boring on the outside, but my brain is busy coming up with cool stuff.

Release day!

My paranormal romance/fantasy novel, The Taste of Magic, is now available as an ebook from Etopia Press! I love the cover, and this is a seriously fun book. It's the one I wrote back in, hmm, 2008 I think--in fact, if I remember correctly, it was my NaNoWriMo book that year.

I wish I were in the position right now to run a contest, but that will have to wait until probably next week. Until then, you can contest yourself with merely buying the book and reading it.

Long Update

I asked for and received permission to post details about what's been keeping me away from the internet for so long. My last post was vague because I didn't want to share information that concerned others--specifically, as is probably pretty obvious, my mom, who is a private person.

Anyway, last month on June 23 Mom had a mild stroke. It's a long and frustrating story of tests and doctors and more tests and more doctors, but here's the short version: Mom has advanced cancer of the uterus, which caused her blood to be abnormally coagulative, which in turn caused a clot in her lungs, which in turn caused her stroke. She's now on bloodthinners to reduce the clotting and on chemo to address the cancer. Without treatment (chemo and bloodthinners), her life expectancy could have been as little as three months.

I've been staying with Mom at the hospital, with only flying visits home to do laundry, shower, and get stuff Mom and I need. For the last week she's been in the Patricia Neal Rehabilitation Center's intensive therapy inpatient program, where she'll probably be for another week. She's doing very well, I'm happy to say. Her stroke was mild, leaving her with only mild physical issues (weak right arm and leg leading to some balancing problems and difficulties doing things like tying her shoes and buttoning clothes) and moderate expressive aphasia, which is a fancy way of saying that somewhere between her brain figuring out exactly what she wants to say and her mouth forming the words, the words vanish into nothing. She's already regained a lot of speech, but it's incredibly frustrating for her--especially considering how eloquent and articulate she's always been. But she's very fortunate that her cognitive abilities are not affected.

I've taken a leave of absence from work until at least the end of August. I have been writing, though. I dusted off Bunny the eee and have typed up everything I wrote longhand during that horrible first week in the hospital. Now that Mom's in therapy most of the day, I write mostly in the evenings. I'm at 50,000 words in my YA novel, Misfits. My novel The Taste of Magic releases from Etopia Press tomorrow and the cover is awesome--I'll try to post it tomorrow if I get a chance. Blogger and Facebook are two of the sites blocked by the hospital's wifi, so I can't post or read blogs unless I'm at home, and I'm not home much.

I feel unbelievably disconnected from the world and from my online friends. I hope everyone's okay. I read Carrie Harris's awesome new book Bad Taste in Boys the other day, but I wasn't able to post on her blog and congratulate her. I know a lot of you have had triumphs and disappointments in the last three weeks and I wish I'd known so I could celebrate and commiserate with you. Once Mom's home, things will be a little easier, and slowly, gradually, I hope life will return to normal as much as it can.

Help with titles

I'm so bad at titles. I got the word the other night that Etopia Press has accepted the sequel to The Taste of Magic (which is still slated for release next month!), but they don't like the title. I was awfully proud of the title, Blood and Taxes. The editors like the word 'blood' but they aren't too keen on the word 'taxes' in the title, which I guess is understandable. Any suggestions for better titles? I told my editor I'd give her some possibilities pretty soon.

In related begging, I'm also trying to come up with names for a little self-publishing outfit for Evil Outfitters. I figure I might as well do it right, and Lightning Source and the ISBN people both require a business name. Any suggestions? I want something memorable but not goofy or overly self-important. So I can't name it after a cute fuzzy animal the way I'm tempted to.

The Taste of Magic has a home

I updated my website today, so I guess I'll go ahead and announce this. I got the contract back and no one's told me to keep it a secret. Etopia Press has accepted my fantasy novel The Taste of Magic! They're a new publisher, so I'm guessing it'll be released sooner rather than later this year as an ebook. Most of the books they've published so far are romances, but they're open to a lot of genres. I like their covers.

I'm happy about that and looking forward to starting edits. I've also got more edits coming up for The Weredeer. Honestly, the best way to improve as a writer is to work with a good editor and apply what you learn to the rest of your writing.

Speaking of which, now I'm diving back in to writing Bloodhound, which is shaping up to be as long as Bell-Men.

I'm Ready. Except for the synopsis part.

I spent this afternoon researching agents for Bell-Men. I haven't heard back from Pyr yet, but it's only been a few weeks and I reckon I ought to get ready to start querying. I actually did query one agent today just because he seemed like a good fit. I'm going to wait for his response too before I start sending out more queries.

My first step was to make a spreadsheet of agents I've queried for other projects. I was surprised that there weren't all that many, actually. I marked down which projects I'd queried about and I also marked down if they'd been a non-responder (because I think no response=no is rude and unprofessional; if you don't have time to respond, close to queries).

After that I made a new list of agents who might be interested in Bell-Men. I did research on each one and marked several off my list, either because they aren't taking on new clients or because they have some drawback like, you know, never responding to queries.

I've ended up with 22 agents. I have a fatalistic feeling that this time next year I'll have added 22 agents to my "already queried" list and will be retiring Bell-Men the way I've had to retire The Taste of Magic due to utter non-interest in the project.

Researching agents may be the most depressing part of the writing business.

I guess the whine-free zone stopped here.

My story "Orcs and Trolls" is up at Every Day Fiction! It's a fun little story, or at least I think so.

I'm glad it was posted today, since it eased the sting a little of the form reject for my requested partial. So far for that book I've sent out--holy crap--21 queries (six of them the new and improved query) and received 12 form rejects, 7 non-responses, and 2 partial requests that ended in form rejects. Since most agents request pages along with the query (and the two partial requests came from agents who don't), I suspect the problem at this point isn't my query but my writing.

So I'm not really sure what to do. I work hard at this, and while I know I'm not very good at evaluating my own work, I'm pretty sure I don't suck completely. I also know that "not sucking" is not going to pop me to the top of any agent's list. I just didn't expect such across-the-board disinterest in what I consider my most accessible manuscript. (I mean, it doesn't have any weredeer in it and it's not written in the style of a 1920s British murder mystery like the other two projects I'm pimping right now.)

I dunno. I'm starting to suspect that all my books must be flawed in some basic and irredeemable fashion that I'm incapable of seeing. It certainly seems clear that The Taste of Magic isn't going to interest any agents and there are only about four SF/F publishers left that still accept non-agented material.

Why yes, I am feeling bitter and discouraged right now. How did you guess?

I'll work on getting back into the whine-free zone tomorrow.

Query, check. Synopsis...uh.

I got my first partial request for the new query that Carrie Harris, Query Ninja helped me with. It's already working! And the agent who wants to see the partial is an agent I would very much like to have.

So I'm all excited, except that now I have to work on my synopsis. My synopsis currently sucks so much that I've deliberately only queried agents who don't ask for synopses with the query. Fortunately, I'm taking today and tomorrow off work and Monday is a holiday, so I have five days to pummel the synopsis into shape. I suspect I'll need all five days.

2 out of 3 ain't bad

This week my plan was to rewrite the query for The Taste of Magic, and revise two stories and send them out. I made it 2/3 of the way through. The query is rewritten, and in fact I sent it out to five agents today. One of the stories is revised and submitted; "Never Be Alone" is going to take more work than I expected to get it to 15,000 words.

So I feel pretty good about the week. I also got a small idea for a short story on Thursday and wrote part of it; I don't know if I'll finish it, but at least I'm writing.

Oh, and to change the subject completely, I saw the new Star Trek movie today and it's completely awesome. And I'm not a big Trek fan.

I know I said I wouldn't, but I lied

Okay, I've read the Query Ninja's suggestions (it's no coincidence that Query sort of rhymes with Carrie) and, once I was done genuflecting in awe, I rewrote The Taste of Magic's query again. And I really, really promise this is the last time I'll post it! Really! Not a lie this time!

I don't know if it's getting any better. I'm so bad at this, and I've sweated over it so long now, that I feel like I'm just stringing words together at random at this point. At least I'm down to just two names now.


Analefa Miradwen is being pulled in different directions by people she's not sure she can trust.

After a vampire mage tries to abduct Ana, she finds out that her blood enhances a mage's spells. Vincent Ondarr, the king's enforcer, thinks he knows why: her mother was a werepanther, and the shape-shifting magic Ana should have been born with is instead concentrated in her blood.

Ana's never told anyone about her parentage and she's furious with Vincent for prying into her secrets. When Ana meets a group of amateur mages agitating for half-breed rights, she offers to help them--even if it means offering them her blood as well.

But the vampire mage is still after Ana, and he seems to have a connection with the half-breed rights group. And while Vincent wants to keep Ana locked in the Tower of Justice for her own safety, his interest in her goes beyond simple protection. If she's going to survive, Ana needs to decide who's really on her side.

Query Hell 2: Return to Query Hell

Okay, here's an updated version of the query. I think it's better. It comes closer to actually describing the book than the previous versions of the query did. And I swear this is the last version I'll post!

Analefa Miradwen has spent the last ten years avoiding vampires and the city guard. She's not happy to learn she's attracted the attention of both, though, when a vampire mage named Magnus tries to abduct her. Magnus wants Ana's blood for its rare magic-enhancing properties, while the king's enforcer, Vincent Ondarr, wants to lock Ana in the Tower of Justice for her own protection.

Vincent suspects Magnus is trying to assassinate the king. With Ana's blood, he could do that and more. But when Vincent starts asking questions about Ana's parentage and brings in a werewolf to sniff out her secret, that her mother wasn't a human but a werepanther, Ana wonders if
Vincent's interest in her goes beyond simple protection.

Then Ana meets Rafael, leader of a group of amateur mages agitating for half-breed rights. Rafael's enthusiasm is exciting, but one of his group members may have a connection to Magnus. If she's going to stay out of Magnus's clutches, Ana needs to decide who she can trust.

My query is drowning in suck

It doesn't matter how I change it at this point, my query for The Taste of Magic still reads like one of the fake plots over at Evil Editor. Its suckiness is compounded by the fact that I left my writing notebook at work this afternoon, so below is the typed-from-memory updated version of the query. Please tell me what the hell I can do to make it less sucky. I'm trying to downplay the vampires, without much luck since the whole plot revolves around them.


Analefa Miradwen has spent the last ten years avoiding vampires and the Carafell city guard. She's not happy to learn she's attracted the attention of both, though, when a vampire mage named Magnus tries to abduct her. Magnus wants Ana's blood for its rare magic-enhancing properties, while the king's enforcer, Vincent Ondarr, wants to lock Ana in the Tower of Justice for her own protection.

Since Ana can't abide enclosed spaces--like jail cells--she takes refuge with her troll friend Ash. She figures no one will look for her in the troll section of Carafell, leaving her free to investigate the strange dormant spell in a friend's new tattoo. But when she meets Rafael, leader of a group of half-breed mages who all have the same tattoo, Ana realizes there's more going on in her city than even Vincent knows.

If Ana wants a normal life again, she's going to have to deal with Magnus herself. To do so, she needs the help of Ash, Rafael, and even Vincent--and she's not sure who she can really trust.

Genderfail, otherfail

Aaron Polson posted about genderfail recently, counting up the protagonists in his stories and making a spreadsheet to see how he did with male vs. female vs. neuter/other protags. That made me think even more about my own writing. I'm not as thorough as Aaron, but I took a look through my stories this evening (published, unpublished, novels, shorts, and works in progress) and I think I'm going to have a long talk with myself.

Going by viewpoint characters alone--that is, the main character through whom we see the story events unfold--I came out about even, with 24 male and 23 female. That's good, especially since if a character appeared in more than one story, I counted him/her more than once.

But if I break this down further and look at non-human characters by gender (counting were-creatures and trolls as non-human but elves as human), 14 were male and only 3 were female. Even taking into account that weredeer Kristof Hart appears five times in the male side (one short story, three completed novels, one novel-in-progress), that's still a big disparity. I can count him only once and still get 10 male, 3 female.

I mentioned in my reply to Aaron's post that I found male characters more interesting (and challenging) to write because I have to work harder to see things through their POV. Apparently I like to take that to extremes. I'm not sure why I think maleness is more challenging to write than alien-ness.

On the other hand, I'm not writing about, say, weredeer just because weredeer are cool (weredeer are by definition uncool); I'm approaching human problems from a fresh perspective. How does a weredeer fit in among a society that is mostly human? Kristof's not always comfortable, even when he's at home. One of the issues I address over and over in my writing is belonging: as a family member, as a friend, as a part of society, and so forth; and one of the big issues that keeps coming up lately in my writing is the idea of race (and, since I write fantasy, species) and how that affects belonging. In The Taste of Magic, for instance, Ana (female!) is a half-breed elf in a society that considers half-breeds second-class citizens--but even half-breeds have things good compared to trolls; I got so into that aspect of the plot that I made it a big focus in the sequel, Blood and Taxes, where Ana and her friend Ash (male troll) keep having to face their society's assumptions and prejudices. I find this fascinating.

And yet, apparently, I also find it overwhelmingly male. Those three non-human females are two dragons and another weredeer, Rose of White Rose, and if you are playing along at home you may remember that White Rose isn't even a real project--it's just an exercise in writing a bad epic fantasy (the one where the elf lord mage has a foot fetish, because I got bored with him and decided to spice things up a little). I actually address gay issues more than I do women's issues even though all those main characters are straight too, since Kristof has to come to terms with his best friend (male human) being gay.

I'm not sure why this is. I have to think about it. I'd love to hear your thoughts on the issue of otherness and character gender.

Favorite characters!

I think Danielle Ferries started this meme, but everyone I know has picked it up and run with it, and now me too. I've been thinking about which of my characters are my favorites, and I've settled on some mildly surprising choices.

Of course I love all my characters, even the most despicable bad guys. But some characters intrigue me more than others, in a writerly way. These are the characters with a lot of surprises up their sleeves, one way or another, the secondary characters who are as vibrant as the main characters, the ones who for whatever reason make me want to write about them forever and ever and ever. Here they are in no particular order:

Kristof Hart--Viewpoint character of The Weredeer, who also appears in the short "The King's Messenger" (which appeared in Renard's Menagerie #5, although I think I have the reprint rights available now and may do something with it). He's not the shiniest spoon in the drawer, but he's ferociously loyal to his family and friends, and he's a good person besides. I feel kind of bad at the awful things I make happen to him.

Ash Cutsaw--Ash is a troll, and he was only supposed to be a minor character in The Taste of Magic. He sort of took over. He's a musician, and a damn good one, and he makes a great foil for Ana, the main character. Ana is talkative, impulsive, warm-hearted, and a little unsure of herself; Ash is cautious, quiet, and knows his place in the world. He's also been in jail!

Rone--Rone doesn't have a last name because he wasn't supposed to have a name at all. In Stag in Velvet, the (um, second) sequel to The Weredeer, he's a market thief Kristof catches and lets go, because Kristof feels sorry for him. He turned out to be useful to the plot so I kept him around--but he's also a fascinating character to write. He's the kind of guy you want to hug one second and smack the next. Kristof isn't sure what to make of him.

Tavrax the Lich--In Evil Outfitters, Ltd., Tavrax is a former warlord lich who has settled down to run Evil Outfitters. He's not a central character in the first half of the book, but I got so fascinated with him that he ended up with a much more important role in the second half. He's intelligent, well-mannered, rather smitten with Madeline Muir, one of his employees (who is also the viewpoint character for the second half of the book), and he also still loves committing the occasional murder.

Yes. I suck.

I've finished the revisions for The Weredeer, or at least the first round of revisions. I changed and added so much to the first chapter that I thought the whole book would change the same way. Instead, except for breaking 13 chapters into 30 (which picked up the pace a lot) and adding paragraphs here and there, I didn't change that much.

I'm not sure if it's because the book is pretty good to begin with, or because I've read it too many times to be very objective, or if I am deluded and everything I write sucks and I am incapable of evaluating my lack of talent and skill. Anyway, I added several thousand words and the first chapter is a billion times better than it was. Most of what I added was description. I did some trimming too, but mostly I added.

Now I don't know what to do with it. I'm discouraged anyway, because I've received four agent rejections on The Taste of Magic already, and only one of those wanted to see a partial first. The rest were just rejections from my query and sample pages. I have five queries pending and a list of more that I can query if I need to. I just thought I'd get a little more response than I have. So once again, I assume that I am a terrible writer and I should just give up and spend my spare time playing video games.

And yet, I still send out queries. And I will continue to send out queries until I have queried every single agent out there who might conceivably be interested in my book. And if I run out of agents, I'll start querying publishers directly. It's a strange and terrible thing, being a writer.

And I have to get up in seven hours, too

I just got an email that my undead shark story has been shortlisted for the Dead Bait anthology. So at least I know they like it well enough not to reject it out of hand, but now I have to wait. And you all know how patient I am.

Actually, I am patient, but I complain a lot.

I'm reading Sarah Monette's Melusine, which I started almost two weeks ago but put down for a while since, after seeing "Slumdog Millionaire" on New Year's Day (an amazing but agonizing movie), I just couldn't face anything else grim for a while. It's beautifully written, and I don't even have to read it in a permanent flinch, because Monette starts off with absolutely no-holds-barred awfulness happening to one of the main characters. After that, I know she's one of those authors who detail wretchedness in loving detail, so every bad thing that I half-expect to happen is going to happen, at length. So I don't have to dread that something awful might happen, because it will happen. Does that make sense? Unfortunately, something that doesn't seem to be happening is a plot. Monette does a lot of walking in place, which is why the book is 500 damn pages long.

Anyway, I'm on page 176 now and only just met the character of Magnus in the last section or so. I have a character named Magnus in The Taste of Magic--not a big deal, except that I also have a character named Felix. No one will ever believe that it's a coincidence and not some half-assed attempt at an homage or whatever, so since I really can't change Magnus's name, my poor Felix will have to get renamed. That's a pity, since I love the name Felix. I already had to change another character's name, and I think that may have been a mistake--he was named Alexander, which was just perfect, but I already had two characters whose names begin with A and two characters whose names end with an "er" sound, so Alexander had to go. I renamed him Dominic. I don't know what I'll rename Felix.

I'm only yammering like this because I don't feel good. I hope it's something I ate and not a stomach virus. Every time I lie down I have to get back up, so now I'm just sitting here with Bunny the laptop, feeling grim and tired and unhappy. So I guess I should go back to reading Melusine.

Mt. Miniature

Okay, sorry, I'll stop being a complaining complainer now. I'm home, I'm full of rather indifferent Wendy's chili, and I'm wearing my green pajamas that have pine trees and deer on them. And I have a real two-day weekend ahead of me for once.

Yesterday at work, in an excess of wretchedness, I wrote a draft of the synopsis for The Taste of Magic. I don't know a single writer who likes doing synopses. They're horrible. You have to take a novel the size of, for instance, Mount Kilamanjaro and reduce it to something about the size of a Hershey's Kiss.

Jettison the subplots! Do not mention most of the characters! Collapse events that happen days apart into the space of half a sentence! Ignore everything except the high points of plot and just enough character bits so that anyone reading will know that there is character stuff going on! Reduce reduce reduce!

And of course, don't forget to make it PUNCHY and HOOKY, and make sure it reflects the flavor of the book! Which is not actually possible in 500 words!

But it's done, at least, although it needs more work than the actual novel took. Next is the query letter, which is much more fun although just as difficult.

It's all connected! Tangentially!

Does anyone out there know anything about computers? My desktop is driving me crazy since the move. I can't post blogs from it or even comment, and Duotrope's not working correctly, and myriad little things like that. What would cause that? What am I missing? I suspect something to do with Mime, but since I'm not entirely sure what Mime is, I can't move forward on my hunch.

Thank goodness for my eee, that's all I can say. And yay for wifi!

I got the proofs of my story "Gaming Real Life" today and found out that it will be up on MindFlights on December 19. I do like that story. The trolls in it are very similar to the trolls I put in The Taste of Magic, too, which I didn't even realize until I read the story over at lunch. That goes right along with Jamie Eyberg's blog today, where he talks about how he approaches stories--starting with an idea and then seeing where the idea takes him. It's interesting to read the comments to that thread, as different writers talk about how they approach stories. It's actually something I've been thinking about lately, as I notice how so many bits and pieces of my other writing have sifted into The Taste of Magic.

Using a version of the trolls in "Gaming Real Life" is one example. Another is the main character, Ana, who is a healer--because the novella I wrote for the 3-day novel contest had a main character, Hilda, who is a healer. And the issue of race relations as translated into a fantasy setting is one that I keep revisiting; again, it's in "Gaming Real Life," but it's also in the Weredeer books. And so on.

Jamie's post was inspired by Aaron Polson's recent post about how to define horror as a genre. And Aaron has a story newly posted to MindFlights, "The Tiger in the Common Ground," which is really good! Everything connects! Everything connects! Everything connects!

Hey, where's my STUFF?

Okay, so I had planned on blogging about the names in The Taste of Magic, because I realized the other day that I'd used almost every single name on the list I made before I started the book. And some of the names I ended up using in odd ways, like the name Ryman became ryma, a type of alcoholic beverage, and Amon became amon, a traditional troll instrument, and so forth.

But I can't blog about it because the notebook where I have that list of names, and also the bedside table where the notebook was sitting, and in fact pretty much everything else in the whole house, is gone. Because I am moving in with my mom this weekend and while I was at work little pixies came and packed up my belongings and took them to my mom's house. I had to go over to Mom's when I got home to collect a pair of jeans.

Fortunately, the pixies didn't notice the book I am reading, Stevermer's A Scholar of Magics, which I am enjoying immensely and didn't want to put down just yet. I think that's the only book in the house at the moment. Oh, and I loaned my brother Shearin's Magic Lost, Trouble Found, partly out of curiosity to see if a guy would like it, partly because I like the series and I'm recommending it to everyone. I'll keep you all posted on my brother's reaction.

I cheated

I won Nano, yes, and today I went in and uploaded my file so I'd be an official winner, with a certificate suitable for printing and everything. Only, well, I had already combined the two Taste of Magic files and I didn't want to fool with just pasting in the part I wrote during November as opposed to the part I wrote during the latter half of October. So I pasted the whole thing in, which is my I look like I wrote 30-some thousand words today.

On the other hand, damn this is the fastest book I ever wrote. I can't remember the precise day I started it, but if it's been more than a few days over six weeks I'd be surprised. 82,000 words in six weeks! Go me!